I realised that it wasnt that fun and was probably only appealing when i was with neil because i ‘wanted what i couldnt have.’ anyway neil came up the next day to get his stuff give me mine etc and i just couldnt let him go. I realised id made a mistake and that all it had ever been with mark was physical attraction (which he now says is all that he feels for me). So i went back with neil to where he is living right now for the night.

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